As I sat at two great friends of mine wedding this weekend I couldn't help but be all smiles. From the moment she walked down the isle till the end of the reception it was a night filled with love. Love is such a crazy concept to me. We all love something or someone right? I mean I love coffee, I love the real housewives, I love my parents. But this kind of love that you celebrate at weddings, thats the real deal.
pic from the wedding!
I mean this kind of love is a love in which you would literally lay down your own life for. Its the kind of love that you give your whole heart to that person and trust them with everything. This kind of love last forever. Forever with one single person. I am only 23 and to imagine that I could live 60 years with one person is insane!
Where am I going with this? Not quite sure. It just had me thinking how many times we fall into "love" with the wrong person. Now I am not trying to bash dating, because I think dating is great! In fact I love it! I love a free meal, and to be told that I am pretty, and all the fun things that come with dating. What I am getting at is how many times do we settle?
The difference between the kind of love that a lot of people feel today and the kind of love I experienced this weekend is this, they are not settling! Whats the difference between settling and the real deal? What does it look like so I can make sure I am not doing it? That I am still trying to figure out. But from my experiences of dating and being in all the wrong relationships this is what I have come up with.
1) You have to be happy with yourself first before you can be happy with anyone else. Cliche I know, but you need your own identity, your own goals in life, your own beliefs. Then, when you meet Mr. Right he is there to encourage your identity, not take it away! Placing all of your goals into someone else can be overwhelming, and when that relationship fails, you feel like you fail. Just be you girl ;)
2) Be patient. Guys are going to like you. They will want to date you, is going out to dinner with them a bad thing? No. Get to know them. But if you know its not going to work out don't drag him along, or drag yourself along. Be patient for the right guy! That way when he comes along your not tangled in a mess of emotions with Mr. Wrong.
3) Enjoy being single! This is the only time in your life where your only concern is you! You can literally move across country, take any job you want, travel, do anything with out the concern of someone else. Enjoy it! Because chances are, sooner or later it won't be just you anymore!
4) Follow your own dreams and goals. Seriously, do you know what a guy would think if he asked "what is your dream?" and you said "to be a wife, in fact your wife." He would run the other faster than Usain Bollt at the 2012 Olympic games!
What are your goals? What things do you want to accomplish? When you start living for you and your dreams, the right man comes along and BAM he falls right into place. And I can tell you that a man finds it sexy to see a women chasing her dreams rather than chasing him.
After all of this rambling do you get the point of this post? I sure don't! But what I am trying to say is the cliche statement. Everything happens for a reason. Everything happens in God's perfect timing. Trust him with your life, including your love life, be patient, and enjoy your life today. And most importantly don't just settle for a good relationship, wait for a great one!
Can I get an amen for this blog entry!!! Can we please print this and hand it out as flyers to give to women across the country?! Esp my hometown. ALL VALID and true points. So many people throw themselves into "love" and "marriage" for all of the wrong reasons. Enjoy being single, focus on your dreams, and love will come when it is supposed too. I didn't have my first boyfriend until I was 20 and I loved it. I played hard, went to school, got a good job, and made so many memories with my girlfriend. Most of all, I have myself as the foundation for my happiness - not a man. Great post!
ReplyDeleteLove this so much! I love seeing my friends and family in love but it's so easy to get discouraged when you don't have the same thing in your life. I am alllll about loving the single life and loving myself. I know the right person will come along eventually :)
ReplyDeleteLOVE LOVE LOVE this. Did I say I love this? Lots of wisdom in this and you. You need to do a single girl diaries post for me.
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